Memorial Day is this month, and it comes every year with many people asking what I’ll be doing. How I’ll be honoring a day that my husband fought and died to be recognized as a part of.

I guess in a way these days (Veteran’s and Memorial Day) are not so much different then yesterday or the day before, as they’re days that I daily am reminded of with Michael’s absence … with his uniforms that hang lifeless in the closet … with the flag displayed on the shelf. But it’s a day brought to the attention to those outside of my realm, and so a day that I am able to talk about him a bit more and know he’s being remembered.

So my answer for what I will do this month is: Remember his strength and courage. Remember the love that was shown to him and that he showed others gave him the ability to sacrifice his all in the name of sanctifying those attributes and the root of their being.

I’ll reflect on how lucky I am that he chose me, not only to love, but also to bear his legacy and what he stood for in the case he would never return. I’ll think of the men and women of the military that allowed him to flourish in his purpose in life and allowed him the ability to die having found it. I’ll think of April 9th, 2007, the last time I kissed him in the airport. I’ll think of the many like me who shared that kiss they never thought would be there last. I’ll think about those that came before him and after him in serving our country. I’ll remember that in my darkest hours to tap into what he embodied. I’ll think of how proud I am of him (and all of our military) and how I hope to make him proud, too…

I’ll think about what I think about each and every day.

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There are many, many things that have made this country great but one of the reasons that gets the least discussion is the role that the GI Bill had in educating our returning heroes from World War II. The number of returning veterans going to college was unprecedented and that education created the foundation that caused our economy to boom and create an unprecedented increase in the quality of life for the citizens of the United States. My own father was able to get a college degree and eventually a Master’s degree from the GI Bill. In turn, our education system became the envy of the world.

What most Americans don’t realize today is how smart our members of the military are. Our military today is a high tech operation. The ship that I commanded, USS BENFOLD, cost taxpayers over a billion dollars to build and it was manned and operated by a crew of sailors whose average age was 24 years old. I had a crew of 310 young men and women and when I interviewed each and every sailor, I asked them why they joined the military? The overwhelming response was they joined because of the GI bill to get a college education. When I heard that, I decided we would do everything possible to help them get admitted when they left the Navy.

We offered the Scholastic Aptitude Test (SAT) onboard the ship. Fifty percent of my sailors signed up to take it. When the results came back, one of my entry-level sailors had scored a 1490 out of a possible 1600. She was not unusual. Our military today is made up of some of the smartest and most talented soldiers, sailors’ airmen and marines that this country has ever seen. They are honorable and hard working men and women. I have the greatest respect and admiration for them…just like I have for our first responders in Boston.

In a recent speech, a member of the audience asked me what they could do to show appreciation for our military members. My response to the questioner was short and sweet: HIRE THEM. GIVE THEM A JOB when they come home. You won’t regret it. They will be some of the best employees you ever had!

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My time serving and flying with The Blue Angels planted a unique gratitude deep within my being. And ultimately, that feeling inspired a new and rewarding journey: empowering others to live a life beyond what they dreamed possible. I’ve spent the past decade sharing that message with companies around the world, translating Blue Angel methodology into results for teams and individuals alike.

At the core of it all, I’ve found that elevating our performance and moving beyond our dreams is largely a matter of mindset. With The Blue Angels, that mindset was compacted by our overarching mission to be ambassadors of goodwill. It created a powerful bond that allowed every pilot to focus his skills, and his abilities in order to transform inherently unforgiving flight into a daily, thrilling routine.

During this month of military awareness, it’s important to recognize the great gift our service men and women give this country by taking on a purpose larger than themselves. A great way to honor those gifts is to reflect on our own purpose. So ask yourself, what drives your dreams as an individual? What is your company, or your team doing in service of the world at large? When and where can OUR success equal the success of others?

Answering those questions can elevate our performance to new levels, just like it does for The Blue Angels. And when our actions create positive results in the world around us, our definition of accomplishment is changed forever.

Glad To Be Here!

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Why Mental Health Matters?

According to Patricia Farrell’s book: How To Be Your Own Therapist, “being mentally healthy means more than living in the absence of a mental disease; it is about maintaining emotional and psychological balance with our daily interactions and decisions. Low levels of mental health and awareness can prevent us from making the most minor decisions and in turn inhibit our relationships, work, and physical health.”

Given the demands of daily life and the challenges it brings home, we are all at risk of stress. But failing to assess our ability to make decisions and deal with stress, can alter the way our brains function and cause serious mental and physical health issues. Unaddressed mental health issues can severely impact not only our own lives, but also the lives of our loved ones. Therefore, dealing with mild ailments to mental health are just as important as seeking professional health for more serious mental health issues.

Recognize Warning Signs

Finding balance in our lives and determining specific goals are the first step to achieving mental wellness; however, when chronic stress or the inability to control our emotions and actions prevent us from defining and achieving these goals, more serious forces may be at work. Academy award winning actress Patty Duke knows first hand the effects severe mental disorders can have on daily life. Although Patty gained fame through her Oscar Award winning portrayal of the blind, mute, and deft Helen Keller in The Miracle Worker, her personal life was ailed with severe depression, alcoholism, and self-destructive thoughts.

At 35, Patty was diagnosed with manic-depression, more commonly known today as bipolar disorder. Rather than being caused by typical, chronic stresses, bipolar disorder (along with many other serious disorders) is caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain, which causes drastic mood swings, and shifts in energy. Since her diagnosis, Patty has worked to inform the public about the importance of mental health and the severity of mental health disorders. Taking time to honestly assess our own mental health is essential because, as Patty puts it: “The bottom line is: Without treatment [some] diseases just wont go away.”

3 Steps to Improve Mental Health

1) Help you help yourself.

You know your body and mind and only YOU can define what practices are healthy in your life. Take time to recognize which practices in your life are productive and which are counterproductive to your overall mental health and well-being. Define clear goals for yourself and be sure to accurately measure your ability to reach those goals.

2) Don’t focus on what you don’t want; focus on what you DO want!

Co-author of the bestselling Chicken Soup for the Soul series, Jack Canfield attests that there is a “Law of Attraction” within the human psyche. “We are what we think about, and we become what we surround ourselves by.”  Jack also claims that, “success in life depends on 3 things: your mind-set, your skill-set, and your environment.” So rather than focusing on how to eliminate the negative influence in our lives, we should be surrounding ourselves with positive influences and focusing on improvement.

3) Recognize signs of more severe illnesses.

When our lifestyle, decisions, or mood, prevents us from preforming everyday tasks, there is no shame in seeking professional advice. In recent years, seeking mental therapy has become somewhat of a trend. As Patricia Farrell, PhD points out in her book, How To Be Your Own Therapist, Mental health is not about what’s trending; “what really matters is how you can create the best life possible, the life you want and deserve.” When healthy lifestyle choices are not enough, seeking medical advice may be the best way to create this life.

Failing to take the time today to care for your own mental health could cause bigger problems in the future. In light of Mental Health Awareness month, be sure to take a moment and assess or adjust where you stand mentally and emotionally.

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1. Mike Abrashoff

Mike Abrashoff served as military assistant to Secretary of Defense William J. Perry, helped draft the air defense plan for the naval forces in the Persian Gulf in 1990, and served as the Executive Officer of the Cruiser Shiloh to support United Nations sanctions against Iraq. After his work in the Gulf War, Mike helped turn the weakest ship in the pacific fleet–The USS Benfold, into one of the most motivated and high preforming teams.

2. Taryn Davis

The death of her husband in a road-side bomb attack in Iraq in 2007 inspired Taryn Davis to found American Widow Project, which allows about a thousand women who lost their husbands in the armed forces to gather, share stories, and be comforted by the fact that they are not alone.

3. Michael Strobl

Michael Strobl’s personal memoir, Taking Chance (2004) tells of his experience escorting home the remains of a Marine killed in “Operation Iraqi Freedom.” Strobl served in Saudi Arabia and Kuwait during Desert Storm, working as an Operations Research Analyst in the Office of the Secretary of Defense. Today he is a highly in-demand motivational speaker, and currently works at the Pentagon.

4. Carey Lohrenz

Carey Lohrenz was the First female F-14 Tomcat Fighter Pilot in the U.S. Navy. After graduating from the University of Wisconsin Carey attended the Navy’s Aviation Officer Candidate School before starting flight training and her naval career. She is currently working on her Masters in Business Administration in Strategic Leadership and is a Partner and the Vice President of Sales and Business Development at The Corps Group.

5. Charlie Plumb

Despite being detained and tortured as a prisoner of war for 2,103 days in North Vietnam, Charlie Plumb still believes that he has lived the American dream. Prior to his capture, Charlie flew 74 successful combat missions as a Naval pilot over North Vietnam and made over 100 carrier landings. Even after being released from prison, Charlie continued his flying career for 28 years.

6. Tom Casalini

Although not a Veteran himself, Tom Casalini has dedicated his life as a photographer to honoring men and women who have honorably served their country in the armed forces. Specifically, Tom has traveled the country meeting and photographing recipients of the Medal of Honor.

7. John Foley

Naval Pilot, John Foley became Lead Solo of the Blue Angles Flight Demonstration team. Using Blue Angel methodology as a model, he developed a framework for excellence that has informed his life in a profound way and has guided his approach to achievement.

8. Peter Lemon

Peter C. Lemon is one of the youngest surviving recipients of the Congressional Medal of Honor, for assisting in saving lives in Vietnam. United States President, Barack Obama, presented Mr. Lemon the coveted ‘Outstanding American by Choice’ award in a 2009 White House ceremony recognizing his life of professional achievement and civic contribution.

9. Gerald Coffee

Gerald (Jerry) Coffee was awarded the Distinguished ‘Flying Cross’ for taking photos ultimately used by the United States UN ambassador to prove the existence of Soviet missiles in Cuba. After being detained as a POW in North Vietnam for seven years, Jerry was released and returned to operation duties until he retired from active duty with various distinguished service awards.

10. Vincent Boles

As a Major General who commanded soldiers, civilians, and contractors on five continents in the five years following 9/11 (including operation Iraqi freedom), Vincent Boles has experience planning and executing strategy. Today, Vincent uses his 33 years of in depth military experience to teach others how to lead in crisis situations and maintain focus on the ultimate goal at hand.

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Letting the speaker come in and bat clean up can be very powerful. The other bit of timing that is a worthwhile consideration is your company or association’s timeline. But where are you on the curve? You can be on an upswing and riding the waves, or the tides settle down leaving you to navigate a new course. And if you’re caught in a swell, it may soon turn into another mighty change! Matching the speaker’s message and style of delivery can be crucial.

Is it time for a content-laden speaker who can share savvy insights into the marketplace? Do you want that guy who can deliver a swift kick in the attitude?
Maybe the timing is just right for someone who can take the lid off all the stress and put a little humor back into everyone’s day. Will you have them wake everyone up right after coffee and orange juice?

Are your attendees too relaxed after lunch to properly take in the details of an expert? Would it be better to have that sports star speak at night and transform the awards dinner into a superstar sports banquet?

How do you get the word out? Should the name be leaked internally? What about using a clever video to make the rounds? On the other hand, this may be kept under wraps and revealed as a big surprise. Think about it. Try to imagine how the audience will react to your choices. Timing is everything and the choice is yours.

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More About Our Steve Ruskin

When I am not booking the best speakers in the world and making the best match possible for each and every event, I do a lot of theater work. Due to my background in martial arts, I’ve done fight choreography on many stage plays over the years.

Just recently, I was called into work on the musical, The Fantasticks. I was charged with designing a sword fight featuring one hero battling three villains. The catch was that my movements had to fit the musical score perfectly.

The director would ask me to cut a beat here and there, or to work the rhythms I was creating to fit a particular time signature. It was a tremendously rewarding experience to see the lengthy sword battle fit the demands of the music. There was excitement, humor and gracefulness to be seen in all the actors’ choreography. Working on this show made me think about how much timing plays a part in how speakers are fit into a meeting.

Again, timing is everything!

If you are in New Jersey come on out and spend an evening with a romantic fantasy at The Chatham Playhouse. Please be sure to pay attention to the big sword fight in the first act, and the very graceful moves of an unarmed man defending himself against a fencing attack in the second act.

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The month of May has been designated by Congress as National Military Appreciation Month to remind Americans of the importance of the U.S. Armed Forces in history. It is a time for Americans to educate each generation on the historical impact of the country’s military and to recognize the contributions of its soldiers.

Growing up hearing stories about my family members’ service left me with both a deep respect for their service and gratitude. What they sacrificed in their youth-years away from home, lost friends, marriages tested from the hardship of separation, and all they endured-allowed me, all of us, the many freedoms and opportunities we enjoy today.

I felt a responsibility, an obligation, to give back, and always believed that to whom much is given, much is expected. Our country allows for great privileges. Mine was being able to serve.

An anonymous author once penned: “A veteran is someone who, at one point in his/her life, wrote a blank check made payable to “The United States of America,” for an amount of “up to and including my life.”

This May, join me in saying ‘Thank you’ to the veterans and current members of our Armed Forces, American heroes past and present, for their commitment to preserving freedom and democracy, and to those families who made the ultimate sacrifice in the defense of our freedom.

“THANK YOU!”

Interested in bringing Carey “Vixen” Lohrenz to your event?

“Thank you.”

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In light of Jazz Appreciation Month, Michael Gold explains how the characteristics of jazz music are the same characteristics used in our everyday lives, work, and interactions with others.

After earning his Ph.D. in Philosophy and a Masters in Jazz Studies, Michael spent his early career traveling around as a performer with various musical groups. When the time came for him to focus on building a family, Michael stepped back from performance and began a different path; first teaching at higher institutions and then managing operations at a financial company. Even though Michael still enjoyed the jazz scene, his 9-5 job as an operations manager limited his jazz time until he was asked to conduct a jazz workshop for a business organization.

Faced with the challenge of presenting jazz music to business professionals proved easy for Michael. As both jazz music and business, he discovered innovation while maintaining certainty. According to Gold, “2010 IBM CEO Survey of 1600 corporations found that the biggest challenge facing business in the 21st century is one of complexity. The most important tool to deal with this complexity according to these CEO’s is creativity.”

Jazz has the liberating structure that these CEO’s and business owners already understand as essential to innovation. It involves minimal guidelines to keep alive yet has the freedom of multiple iterations to find the best possible solution. In our constantly changing, high tech world, adaptability is more important than ever before. Michael describes business without innovations like classical music; “they are both necessary yet rudimentary, structured, and unchanging.” Jazz music, however embodies the innovation and creativity needed to innovate and adapt in our fast paced world.

“You don’t have to be a music expert to appreciate jazz!”

According to Michael, “we have a powerfull pool of technology that gives us the ability to improvise. If we don’t understand the integral dynamics that allow us to deal with ambiguity and change we are all in big trouble.” Music, particularly jazz music, has the power to help individuals and business leaders deal with the ambiguity of our increasingly fast paced society. Jazz not only invokes creativity, but it also demands a great deal of attention. In his career of presenting jazz music to business professionals, Michael has found that “when you give people in a particular culture a platform (such as jazz) that opens creative imagination it is a huge opening for them.”

So in these last few days of Jazz Appreciation Month, take a moment to find a jazz tune that appeals to you and listen to how the instrumentalists play off of one another. Then apply that same relaxed structure of adaptability to the business and social interactions in your own life. After all, there are only two types of music: music you like and music you don’t like. Finding the music that best fits your mood may just be a start to finding the practices that best suite your business and lifestyle.

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- 25% of the people thought it was an Indian Reservation
- 25% of the people thought that it was a Wildlife Refuge
- 50% thought it was a Brand of Whiskey

But seriously, this lack of financial literacy comes at a very heavy cost. It limits each person’s upward potential while it causes companies to make questionable decisions.  Additionally, studies show that most investors earn paltry returns on their investible dollars (this of course, is just the opposite of a true investment goal of higher returns with lower risks) while taking on high risk that they don’t fully understand.

In the last four years the stock market has had its greater rally since WWII, while most investors have remained on the sidelines. This condition o I have been teaching finance at Tulane University for the past 26 years and have spoken to more than 1000 groups in 47 states and several countries.

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